What being fired taught me

I KNOW it’s cliché, but being fired taught me that when one door closes, another one opens. But that’s not what I was thinking as I was listening and processing the words my Principal told me when she was telling me that I was terminated after telling the exact same thing to my coworker about 5 minutes earlier.

See, I saw my students’ and their parents’ faces flash in front of my eyes. I knew I wouldn’t be able to say goodbye, and that the one parent who told me that I was her daughters first liked teacher in all 8 years of her attending the school wouldn’t get to know that I didn’t choose to leave, someone else chose for me. I knew that I let all of my students down. I knew that me walking out the door meant another long-term or maybe a few short-term subs, none of which would be nearly as passionate about Science like me. I knew that I was walking out on my students and their education. I knew that I was severing a minimum of 200 relationships I had built over the past 6 months. And there was a part of me that wondered if I was even cut out to be a good teacher.

In that moment, I felt like a failure. The weight on my chest was heavy, and it took every ounce in me to not cry until I was in my car. I was nearing a panic attack but thankfully after a few phone calls to some close friends, I was feeling better. Two days later, I had a job interview lined up for later that week. Seven days later, I had a job offer that I would’ve never imagined receiving and accepting. While it sounds corny, a shift in my mindset was needed to even be open to the idea of finding not just a new job, but a new career opportunity. I also had to realize that just because one person didn’t see my value didn’t mean I wasn’t worth it. I learned that my value wasn’t found in just my job or career. I learned that while one door was closing, another one was opening. I learned that I wasn’t a bad teacher, and that I only needed to find a school and administration that saw my value and invested in me.

Today I am happy to be a middle school Science teacher for Chicago Public Schools. Me being fired led to a few big changes in my life and career, including but not limited to a $13k increase in salary, the ability to purchase a home for my daughter and me, the ability to grow my skills through paid and increased access to Professional Development, more affordable health insurance, and shorter working hours AND more prep time (and less lesson plans!!!!). All in all, this season of being fired turned out to be just what I didn’t know I needed.